Couples, don't starve your sex

Mark wiens

Timeļ¼š01-16

Thomas Lacor, a famous American scholar, once said: "For human beings, sex is not just sex, sex is a language, a bridge from loneliness to intimacy, a melting pot to build mutual belonging." But nowadays, sexless marriage caused by various reasons has become a global spread of "infectious disease", to more and more families bring trouble.

According to Men's Health, 40 percent of families in the UK have experienced problems due to a lack of sex. A 2017 US socio-demographic survey found that more than 15 percent of men and nearly 27 percent of women had not had sex in the past year of their marriage.

Good sex has many benefits for humans, not only improving relationships, but also eliminating stress, boosting immunity, and giving people confidence. Generally, a sexless marriage is defined as having sex less than 10 times a year. Lack of sex can cause emotional, physical and mental damage to both partners, and may even affect marriage and social stability.

"Data from multiple studies suggest that male fertility is declining." Zhang Maoyun, associate professor of psychology at the School of Public Health at Southern Medical University, told the Life Times: "Decreased fertility means lower sperm count and androgen levels, which will inevitably affect libido and lead to an increase in asexual marriages." The largest ever study on the change of human sperm count was published in Human Reproduction Express. After investigating the epidemiological data of 42,935 people worldwide from 1973 to 2011, it was found that the sperm concentration of global men decreased by 59.3% over the past 40 years, which was related to environmental pollution, excessive food addition, smoking and drinking.

In addition, according to Zhang, several other factors are also key to sexless marriage. First, the marital emotional life is not harmonious. Due to lack of communication or poor communication between couples, both parties are in a state of conflict and hostility for a long time, which seriously hinders sexual expression. Second, with the rapid development of The Times and economy, heavy work and life pressure will affect libido, and there is no time and energy for sex, which is most obvious in developed countries. Third, aging or chronic diseases such as high blood pressure and diabetes, as well as mental illnesses such as chronic anxiety and depression may affect a healthy sex life, while the use or abuse of therapeutic drugs may reduce libido or sexual ability, such as some antidepressants may cause erectile dysfunction and difficulty orgasming; Fourth, there is an increase in marital burnout and extramarital sexual behavior. While marital sexual attraction decreases over time, extramarital sex also reduces sexual interest in your partner. Fifth, some special reasons may also lead to less sex in marriage. Some couples may marry only for legal purposes or tax benefits, commonly known as marriages of convenience; Some are worried that their minor children will not be able to bear the blow of their parents' divorce and make do with their lives until their children go to college. In countries where homosexuality is not decriminalized, some gays and bisexuals are pressured to marry. Lack of knowledge about sex, belief that sexual intercourse is bad for your health, or lack of knowledge about how to have pleasant sex make it difficult to have a satisfying sex life in these types of marriages.

Michelle Weiner Davis, author of The Sex-Starved Marriage in the United States, explained the lack of sex in marriage by saying that long-term unfulfilled intimacy within a marriage will cause harm and may put the marriage at risk. Therefore, it is very important to improve the asexual marriage and maintain the emotional and physical intimacy between the couple. In the process of sexual activities, men usually play a leading role, therefore, men should be aware of sexual health, pay attention to the quality of marital sex, and find a good balance between work and life.

Decreased sexual frequency is closely related to increased incidence of chronic diseases, so it is necessary to strengthen physical exercise. Couples can jog, play badminton, swim, dance, etc., not only promote health, but also enhance the couple's affection. Seventh, if the problem of marital sexlessness cannot be solved through their own efforts, they can seek help from sex therapists or reproductive health counsellors in regular hospitals or institutions.

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